For years now I’ve heard of Dixie’s BBQ out in Redmond, Wash. Friends of mine would tell me stories of people who have started to cry after meeting the man. The tears weren’t of joy, but of searing, burning pain of the mouth. The tear ducts involuntarily releasing liquid at will.

Today, I met The Man and if it weren’t for the two cartons of milk I had on standby I wouldn’t be here writing this post. The generous helping of BBQ beef looked innocent enough between the two buns. I dipped a toothpick into the man sauce and mixed it into the beef. I barely coated the toothpick.

I sat down and immediately took a bite because I couldn’t wait to accomplish the goal of eating Dixie’s. Not two seconds later I started feeling a burn that coated my entire mouth. I said to my friend Paul, “Wow that really is hot,” like a true rookie. He laughed and I reached for my 2% milk. I wished I had whole milk.

The meal was delicious and the milk kept me enjoying the tender shredded beef smothered in think BBQ sauce. I took my time and enjoyed every savory bite.